me: *sees a sweet caring courageous character* you’re gonna be my favourite
me: *sees a sarcastic apathetic trashbag character* you’re also gonna be my favourite
what’s a pirates favorite letter?
if it’s rrrrrrr i’m going to kill you
you may think its r… but his true love be the C
i fucking hate this website
This might win the ‘literally a gif for everything’ trend
"just one more video then i’ll go to sleep”
THIS MAKES ME VERY VER YVERY VERY VERY VERY VERY HAPPY
When you crack your knuckles you hurt the skeleton inside you
Good, the skeleton needs to know that I am the alpha and I am in control.
Break your own bones to establish dominance over skeleton.
i love catfish so much because they act like theyre fbi agents or something when theyre really just using reverse google image search
i thought you meant the animal and let me tell you that was a wild minute of me trying to figure out the psychology of fish thinking they’re federal law enforcement
rainy weather and thunder doesn’t make me gloomy at all it’s more like, fuck yeah this is my kingdom of darkness and i’m the queen
do you ever get in those moods where you don’t feel like reading and you don’t feel like being on the internet and you don’t feel like watching a show and you don’t feel like sleeping and you don’t feel like existing in general
the past is a strange place
cops on bikes used to transport criminals like this
this guy worked as an alarm for waking people up
one wheel motorcycle
pin-boys who manually lined pins up
baby cage for families who wanted their kids to get enough sunlight
zoo-keeper showering a penguin
But who woke up the guy that woke everyone else up
I tried a 2-D printer once, and the paper jammed.
So now I just painstakingly re-create my paper copies by hand, like a medieval monk.
i tried using paper, but the edges crumpled
so now i just chisel my commandments into stone, like old testament god
I tried using stone, but it cracked and broke.
Now I just scream everything at passersby, hoping they’ll remember what I said so I can ask them about it when I need it.
I tried shouting things at passersby but they ignored me.
Now I emit allohormones in a gypsobelum that bonds selectively with the recipient’s hemolymph to reconfigure their bursa copulax into a copulatory canal. I can only say one thing, “I want to mate with you,” but really, what else ever needs to be said?
one of my favorite things is how people talk to themselves in tumblr tags, taking this space designed for metadata classification and using it as a form of parenthetical speech. those grey little tags feel so cozy, a whispered dimension to the flat communication of the net
my ultimate goal is to be at peace with myself, eliminate toxic feelings and elements and energies from my life, unlearn negative and harmful practices and thought patterns, stop checking for people that don’t check for me, create a space for myself that is nurturing for growth so that i may generate loving energy for myself and for others, nourish my spirit and balance my energies, i have big dreams and i deserve to live a life i love and let that love radiate
when you know something doesnt fit in the fridge but you force the door shut and let it fall out on someone else